PROMPT:
Some argue that globalization has resulted in both positive and negative impacts on societies worldwide. Discuss both perspectives and give your opinion.
MODEL ESSAY:
Globalization is a term that signifies the interconnectedness and interdependence of nations through the exchange of goods, ideas, and culture. While some argue that globalization has had negative impacts, I am of the opinion that the benefits it brings far outweigh any drawbacks.
On the positive side, globalization has opened up markets and led to increased economic growth worldwide. Companies now have access to a global consumer base, allowing them to expand and create more job opportunities. Additionally, globalization has facilitated the sharing of knowledge and technology, leading to advancements in various fields such as medicine, communication, and transportation. For example, the spread of information technology has revolutionized the way we communicate and do business, making the world more interconnected than ever before.
Despite these advantages, globalization has also led to some negative consequences. One of the main criticisms is the widening wealth gap between the rich and the poor. Multinational corporations often exploit cheap labor in developing countries, leading to income inequality and social unrest. Furthermore, increased global trade has raised concerns about environmental degradation and the depletion of natural resources. For instance, the demand for goods has led to higher levels of pollution and deforestation in many parts of the world.
In conclusion, while there are certainly drawbacks to globalization, I believe that the benefits it brings far outweigh the negative impacts. By fostering economic growth, technological advancement, and cultural exchange, globalization has the potential to improve the lives of people around the world. To mitigate its negative effects, it is essential for governments and international organizations to implement policies that promote fair trade, protect workers' rights, and preserve the environment.
EVALUATION:
- Task Response (Band 9): The essay responds fully to the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of globalization and providing a clear opinion supported by relevant examples.
- Coherence and Cohesion (Band 9): The essay is well-organized, with clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Ideas are logically presented and transitions are smooth.
- Lexical Resource (Band 9): The vocabulary used is varied and appropriate for the task. Academic terms related to globalization are used accurately, enhancing the overall sophistication of the essay.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (Band 9): The essay demonstrates a high level of grammatical accuracy, with complex structures used effectively. Sentences are varied, and errors are minimal.
Overall, this essay meets the criteria for a Band 9 score in the IELTS writing test. The candidate effectively addresses the prompt, demonstrates a high level of language proficiency, and presents a well-structured and coherent argument.
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